Finding Grace in the Chaos: Productivity Tips for the Christian Mother.
Being productive at home is essential for maintaining efficiency, organisation, and overall well-being. As Christian mothers, we are juggling numerous responsibilities: nurturing children, maintaining a household, perhaps working from home, and most importantly, fostering a spiritual environment for our families. In the midst of this whirlwind, finding ways to be productive at home can often feel like a daunting task. However, with a little organisation, a lot of trial and error and grace, it’s entirely possible to manage our time effectively and create a peaceful, thriving, productive home.
Whether you’re homeschooling, managing a home business, or simply trying to keep up with daily chores and tasks, these tips will guide you towards more organised and fulfilling days. Let’s transform our homes into spaces where faith, love, and productivity coexist harmoniously. Here are some quick fire tips to help us achieve this.
Streamline your routine
Simplify your daily tasks by creating a streamlined routine. Identify repetitive tasks and find ways to automate or batch them to save time and energy. Establishing a consistent schedule for chores, meal preparation, and other household responsibilities can help you stay organised and productive.
Declutter Regularly
Keep clutter at bay by decluttering your home on a regular basis. Take time to purge unused or unnecessary items. You can start small and pick a draw or corner of the house. Organising your belongings in a way that maximizes space and functionality doesn’t just provide a clutter-free environment, but it promotes a sense of calm and clarity, making it easier to focus and enjoy your living space.
Prioritise Multi-Functional Solutions:
Opt for multi-functional furniture, storage solutions, and appliances to maximise space and efficiency in your home. Look for versatile pieces that serve multiple purposes, such as a storage ottoman that doubles as extra seating, and a place for toys and games, or a fold-down desk that transforms into a dining table. Choosing multi-functional solutions allows you to make the most of your space without sacrificing functionality.
Create Zones for Efficiency:
Divide your home into zones based on functionality to optimise efficiency and organisation. Designate specific areas for activities such as work, relaxation, and play, ensuring that each zone is tailored to its intended purpose. Creating designated zones helps minimize distractions and promotes productivity by providing dedicated spaces for different activities. Sharing our living space with children doesn’t mean that our home can’t feel calm and organised. We can create fun zones for them, as well as more minimal areas that serve the purpose of relaxation, rest and productivity.
Embrace Minimalism
Embracing a minimalist mindset helps us to prioritise quality over quantity and to focus on what truly adds value to our lives. If it is your preference, curating a home environment that is clutter-free and conducive to peace and tranquility can help your mind feel much calmer. Embracing minimalism allows you to simplify your life, reduce stress, and cultivate a sense of contentment with less.
I hope you enjoyed this quick fire style post! I hope that you’ll be able to build on some of the points and they help enhance efficiency, organisation and productivity in your life.
There are days when I don’t know whether I am going or coming…
I feel an overwhelming sense of grief- partly because of what I see going on around me, and also from internal thoughts. However paradoxically I am at peace because I know that I am in the place that I need to be. I am positioned where God needs me to be in order to be pruned.
Character development is crucial.
I ask the Lord of a few things, frequently. Strength to help me to stand against the enemy, a discerning spirit to know what to pray against, and for the Holy Spirit to take control of my mind. I have no strength apart from what He graces me with. Since I left career I have not blogged about my experience because quite frankly I have not been able to articulate the experiences, and I do not feel as though I actually have my feet on the ground…
To say that the past few months have been a blur and a whirlwind is a serious understatement. How can multiple thoughts, feelings, emotions and knowledge all co-exist and be activated all at the same time?
I suppose that is where I should be though right?
In my weakness His strength is made perfect. In my weakness, I find myself clinging unashamedly to His hope and the cross even more. In my weakness I dare not even boast in my own ability.
One MAJOR thing that I didn’t even think about, are the enemy’s attacks. They have become more vivid and more visible than I have ever experienced them to be. The past few weeks have been filled with a variety of attacks from terrible dreams, thoughts, irritations, frustrations and physical obstructions and injuries.
Until I realised…
How could I make such a bold step for the Lord and not expect the enemy, my adversary to rage. WOW.
His obsessive preoccupation is to steal from me, to kill dreams and to destroy my life (John 10:10). He will go after any and everything, subtle and obvious. He seeks to ravage my soul with his lies and and blind me to the truth of God’s goodness and provision for my life. He seeks to convince me of failure and hardship, convince me that there is something wrong with me when in fact there is everything wrong with him.
He throws things my way all to evoke anger, jealousy, annoyance and resentment regarding many things. It is very hard and it can be discouraging. Fear creeps in. I feel lost and doubtful. As soon as my mind starts to trail onto these things he ponces on them.
I realise that I have a very real enemy as a woman who stands for the things of God and who is seeking to live His way. This enemy is a terrorist to my soul..
However he does not get the victory because my Bible tells me in 1 John 4:4, But you belong to God, my dear children. You have already won a victory over those people, because the Spirit who lives in you is greater than the spirit who lives in the world.
I am intentional about deciding to bat away his lies by not entertaining his deceiving thoughts that come into my mind.
Be encouraged mama…
Our responsibility is to ask the Lord to help us seek out the subtle things that the enemy goes after. For me it was the seduction and temptation to accept something into my life that will ultimately take me off track and distract me from my journey. This came in the form of discouragement and doubt.
My prayer is Lord help me to discern the enemy’s work in my life.
My weapons against him are;
The Word, praising God, continuing to walk in obedience, faith, prayer, worship, and fasting.
I realise that the greater my commitment to the Lord, the more the enemy will try to attack. Whenever there is a move into a new season of your life/work/ministry he will do all he can to wear you down with discouragement, sickness confusion, guilt, strife, fear, depression or failures. He threatens your mind, emotions, health, work, family and relationships. I realise that Abba has given me this portion to diligently engage in spiritual warfare. I cannot afford NOT TO.
2 Corinthians 10:3-5 –Though we walk in the flesh we do not war according to the flesh. For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but they are mighty through God for the pulling down of strongholds, casting down imaginations and every high thing that exalts itself above the knowledge of God, and bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ.
You see when we go through things in life we have to know that it is not in our own strength to overcome. God is at work behind the scenes- even in the seemingly ugly. We must continually stand on God’s Word, and hope in Him alone. This season of my life is EPIC and I look at all the things that God is doing with me right now! Cast them down with the authority that I have been given. My life is beautiful not because of any material/outward possession.
My life is beautiful because I have Jesus Christ and He alone is my strength and hope. Forever.
Stay encouraged, be encouraged my love. Overwhelming victory is ours through Christ Jesus no matter the storm or life experience.
This post is to encourage you to know that you can find joy and happiness being based right from home. You can thrive in your own environment when you create the conditions to help support you and your family. It takes time but it is well worth the effort.
By wisdom a house is built, and through understanding it is established; (Proverbs 24:3)
Wisdom helps us to order our lives with intent. The virtue of wisdom has constructive, life-giving qualities. It initiates life, produces good fruit, creates, nurtures, fosters, establishes, and fills a house- a physical house, a family, and even our personal character with strength for our days.
Feed your soul the inspiration it needs
As a busy mum, it is easy to spend my down time binging on things that don’t necessarily feed my soul because I feel tired and drained after a long day with my children. As relaxing as it can feel to go through a series on Netflix in one sitting, or watch countless Youtube videos, it doesn’t truly feed my soul with the inspiration and strength that I need in the long term. After a while I am still left feeling drained which means that it’s imperative to fill myself with spiritually, physically and mentally nourishing “food”.
Finding creative ways to squeeze in things that inspire and encourage our souls has to be a real intentional effort as we seek to shape and stir our minds toward things that delight and inspire us to love our homes and families better. When we pour into ourselves well, we are not only strengthened, but the overflow is like a beautiful fragrance that fills our environment- which in turn blesses those around us.
Some helpful tips include listening to relevant podcasts while cooking, cleaning or having a shower, listening to audiobooks while taking a walk or doing the food shop, and reading books/our Bibles during morning breakfast or read aloud time with the children. Also, identifying an interest that you may have, and finding a small margin in your schedule to engage with it (e.g. exercise, leisurely reading, drawing, cooking etc) helps you to engage with the things that make you you. I’ve found that when I have given myself a little time, I feel a little more refreshed to then give of myself to others.
Taking tasks in bite sized forms to beat overwhelm
Some days just feel very blah and no matter how much you spiritualise or “speak into existence”, it can just be a very flat day that requires things to just get done. As busy mothers, the to do list is endless. As you cross off one thing on your list, five more are added and this can create a lot of overwhelm, and feelings of being buried. Inspiration can be hard to draw upon, procrastination knocks persistently at your door and you just feel like doing absolutely nothing even when you have things to do.
So how can we be happier when we have a never ending to do list? We can break down our tasks into order of priority and categories, and start tackling them bit by bit. The satisfaction of ticking a few things off creates a snowball effect that gives us momentum to tackle the other things. What are the things you want to spend your time on? Prioritise the categories, put the most important ones first and batch/ block them so you feel more accomplished as you tick things off slowly.
This is a great way to be intentional with your time particularly when it all feels like a melting pot of things that need to be done but you don’t want to do it. Intentionality is not about ignoring the things we don’t enjoy, because that creates overwhelm, anxiety and stress. It’s about the management of all the moving parts of our lives and, and taking back the control and order as much as we can. When practiced and mastered, it helps us to live in a much happier, calmer state of mind.
Take stock of all the positives and be thankful for it
We are prone to look at the negatives all the time because there are painful, challenging and frustrating things to deal with on a daily basis. A part of it is the reality of adulthood! Decide that although challenging moments are always there, you aren’t going to camp there. While dealing with challenging and frustrating things, we can still take stock of all the positive things that we do have in our lives and that we have been blessed with.
One of the greatest hacks to be happier at home is contentment. We can make the choice to be content with what we have in our lives, and how our lives look like. This can be a hard one because we live in a time where we see and know everything that goes on in the lives of other mothers and families and it can make us feel as though we aren’t enough and don’t have enough.
Taking time out to write down the things which you are thankful for will help you to realise that you are indeed blessed- everyday! Your life is unique to you and your family and accepting this helps us to truly own it and then look for ways to beautify and enjoy it!
Decide what matters
Following on from the first point, I believe that intentionality means prioritising the things that you do every single day that line up with your personal values and your personality. We get to choose the things that matter to us and this in turn helps build a life around things that we need to do in order to achieve the goal of what matters to us. For example, being outside for some period of time each day is very important to me.
I find walking to be a great form of exercise, but very therapeutic and healing as I get time to pray, reflect, release and just enjoy the movement of my body and my surroundings without feeling the pressure of passing through to get to somewhere else.
As this is an important thing for me, and even more so for my boys, I choose to make it a priority for us to get outside in nature as often as possible. Depending on the day I’ll build our schedule around it or if we are having a particularly difficult morning, I’ll pause, we’ll put our trainers on and get outside for movement and fresh air.
Knowing what matters to you and how you can make steps to achieving that can be helpful when thinking of ways to be intentional as a mother. You don’t need to have a long list of things, but just taking action on a few core areas that are meaningful to you helps you to feel grounded and in control of your life during the busy and quiet periods. Working on a family mission statement is helpful in this area as it encourages you to dig deep to identify the things of value to you and your home. Once you begin to lock in on this, it makes you happier in the home and with life.
Create a Christ-Centered Home
Last but not least, as Christians, infusing our homes with the love and fragrance of Christ brings such peace and joy that really cannot be matched. Cultivating a Christ centered home is essential to the quality and longevity of our family unit and as a multilayered and complex thing that God has ordained to be put together, there is purpose, intentionality, and beauty that can be experienced deeply when we choose to keep Christ at the centre of the home.
We can achieve this by incorporating scripture readings, prayer time, and discussions about faith into our daily routines. Playing worship music throughout the day also really helps to draw our hearts back onto God as well as helping the children to memorise songs!
I looked at my little 5 year old as I attempted to engage him in some sit down learning and I felt two strong emotions. Compassion because I could see he wasn’t just struggling with the task, but he really wasn’t enjoying it. I also felt frustrated because here we were, on yet another day and I felt like a failure at not being able to “crack the code” when it came to winning his interest and attention to sit down and work through some pages with me.
Teaching our children can feel like a very daunting task, and one of the beautiful benefits of home schooling is that learning can be tailored to the strengths of each child, and time can be given to really personalise their learning experience and build their confidence. Equally, it can be frustrating because you are dealing head on with their struggles everyday. If you are feeling overwhelmed with where to start with the different personalities of your children, here are some strategies that you can try which I hope will help:
Please note that this post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase through these links, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. Your support helps keep this blog running.
1. Identify Each Child’s Learning Style
Understanding how each child learns best is the first step. Common learning styles include visual (learning through images and spatial understanding), auditory (learning through listening and speaking), kinesthetic (learning through physical activities and hands-on experiences), and reading/writing (learning through reading and writing activities). Supporting our children to learn in a way that is natural to them will help them thrive and it will alleviate a lot of the frustration that we and they feel when it comes to growing learning and discovering the word around them.
It takes time and you may have good days and bad days, but I’m learning to just embrace it all and take my time and try to enjoy the process. First born is very much a kinaesthetic learner and so I can exercise wisdom in this area, and instead of expecting and demanding him to do book work, what I try to do with his learning is to break it up into chunks of tasks. He will do what I refer to as core discipline studies which is a few minutes on penmanship, working out some number sums, and a little bit of phonics. Once he has completed that, his reward is working on a lego project or STEM activity which he absolutely loves.
2. Create a variety of learning activities:
Offer a mix of activities that cater to different learning styles. For example:
For visual learners: You could use diagrams, charts, videos, and illustrations to explain concepts.
For auditory learners: Engage in discussions, storytelling, reading aloud, and listening to educational podcasts.
For kinesthetic learners: Incorporate hands-on activities, experiments, role-playing, and physical games.
For reading/writing learners: Provide written materials, encourage note-taking, and assign reading assignments followed by discussions or written summaries.
DIY project tasks have worked really great with my eldest because it allows him to use his brain in a very active way which he absolutely loves. He loves to solve puzzles, and find solutions to tasks, so this has really engaged him. I also see how it fuels his confidence because once he realises his strength and what he’s naturally good at, he wants to learn more and he wants to do more. He loves to talk about the things that he’s created and how he has put it together which is so encouraging to hear.
My second born is predominantly a read and write learner. He takes in information that’s written down in a very logical way. He enjoys books and equations so I find that the traditional books work well. He enjoys the typical comprehension, questions and tasks, and figuring things out, so my approach for him, leans towards text, and any visual or auditory representation of an idea, which he does really well with. Seeing these two different learning styles makes me realise that God really makes none of us the same. We are wired so differently, so uniquely, so wonderfully by Him. As a mother, it is amazing to be able to nurture and bring out, and help my children to discover who God has made them to be.
3. Provide Choices
And another way you could figure out your child’s learning style is by providing them with a few choices for different types of work that you want them to complete over the period of a few weeks and observe what they gravitate to. This will help you to know where to lean into for learning activities. You can also engage in conversation with them about things they enjoy and why they enjoy it. This will give you an idea of how to put together their learning and play sessions. Hopefully in doing this, it will help your child to enjoy and stay focused on what they consider to be fun while also learning and activating a huge part of their brains in an activity.
Offer choices whenever possible to empower children in their learning process. For instance, allow them to choose from different assignments or projects that align with their interests and learning styles. Observe how your children respond to different learning activities and environments. Talk to them about their preferences and experiences in learning situations.
4. Create an environment that makes learning look fun
I am a minimalist calm, create a spa like ambience in my home type of girl, and so the thought of turning my entire home into a nursery or learning class doesn’t quite appeal to me, but I do recognise that for children, visuals are so important for inspiration, for memory, and for representation of where they are in this life stage. My laminator, my printer and Twinkl website are my best friends as I print put together little resources and learning packs for the boys.
I always have to remember that they are children and it’s important to encourage them to see the world with wonder, and to beautify it in a way that appeals to their senses. When I look at it from that perspective, creating a learning environment whether it’s a corner, conservatory, a whole room, or a bedroom seems like so much fun and even an inspiration to myself.
Creating a fun learning environment can really enhance their engagement and enthusiasm for learning. Most of us don’t have a separate room that we can turn into a magical learning world for them but if we really look around, we’ll see that we have pockets of space throughout our homes that we can use. If you want to encourage a love of books, you could create a small nook with either a book shelf or some baskets and keep a few books there, or scatter small piles of books throughout the house for them to casually pick up. The same can be done with toys and puzzles or whatever their interest may be.
5. Assess, pivot, personalise and pray
We can pray and ask God to give us wisdom to encourage and teach our children, as well as to give the process over to Him to do a work in our own hearts. We all change as we grow and so do our children’s learning styles over time. Keeping our expectations open will help us to pivot when we need to without feeling too overwhelmed. I am trying to be so much more intentional about just enjoying life and enjoying the process with them. The rest will surely fall into place as we journey along.
A book that has really encouraged me in this area is Sally Clarkson’s book: Awaking wonder. As mothers we want the best for our children. We want them to thrive in every area of their lives and we want to give them a strong foundation. However, it’s so easy to lose sight of the wonder that is found in the journey to this destination, and I think that I’ve come to understand how childlike wonder really can become lost in the fog of formulas, strict curriculum and pressure from external things. Helping my boys to engage authentically and confidently with who they are, while leaning into the truth that wonder and curiosity without constraints does empower such a powerful educational experience.
My encouragement to you Mama
“To give a child the gift of time to imagine, to dream, to create, to engage, and to wonder is to allow time and space for his heart to be touched by the beauty surrounding him, for his mind to have room to grow strong on the feast laid out for his imagination, and for his emotions to bathe in the tranquility of a peaceful life in an unhurried rhythm. Then we offer a feast of theology, math, story, literature, virtue, faith, science, nature, art, music and culture upon which to apply his wondering and wonderful mind. To lay this foundation is to give our children beauty and strength of imagination and the strong pleasure of learning and acquiring knowledge over a lifetime. Wonder is the catalyst in shaping a powerful, engaged intellect.”
For Christian mums looking for inspiration, guidance, and spiritual nourishment! Whether you’re navigating the complexities of motherhood, seeking to deepen your faith, or simply craving moments of reflection and perspective in the midst of the demands of it all, I hope that these nine books will encourage you just as much as they’ve encouraged me! Each one offers a wealth of wisdom, practical advice, encouragement, and insight, reminding us of the profound significance of our role and the love and grace of Christ that sustains us on our journey.
Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links, which means I make a small commission at no extra cost to you. See my full disclosure here.
Risen Motherhood: Gospel hope for everyday moments
The first parenting book that I read and it blew my mind away! The wisdom in this book is incredible and very convicting. Tedd Tripp really goes into detail on the importance of looking at the heart of our children and seeking to disciple the heart over correcting outward behaviour. It’s challenging, informative, direct and focuses on Biblical principles and practices.
If you are feeling overwhelmed with creating new and unique family traditions this book is really helpful in kickstarting it for you. There are so many ideas to bring joy and personlised experiences into your home which is something that all of us want to give to our children. I see it as part of our legacy building and what makes our family “us” so this book is a little gem!
I love Sally Clarkson and her vision and heart for home. She is an older much wiser and seasoned woman who comes along side you in her books to share the heart of God for our lives and it is such an encouragement and challenge to our hearts as mothers.
This is a really great practical book that helps us to keep our eyes on Christ in the midst of the busyness and chaotic moments in motherhood. Reading the book shook my preconceptions about the significance of hardship in motherhood, deepened my understanding of biblical teachings regarding trials, and reinforced the truth that contentment and joy can’t come from anything else but Christ.
It’s not your typical how-to guide, which is really refreshing considering the inundation of parenting manuals that are out there. What I love the most about this book is that it prompts us to reflect on the higher calling of nurturing children for the glory of God. It also gives a lot of practical and realistic tips that don’t feel so overwhelming to achieve.
For this review I’ll have to post the authors statement as it sums up the book perfectly.
Desperate is for those who love their children to the depths of their souls but who have also curled up under their covers, fighting back tears, and begging God for help. It’s for those who have ever wondered what happened to all their ideals for what having children would be like. For those who have ever felt like all the “experts” have clearly never had a child like theirs. For those who have prayed for a mentor. For those who ever felt lost and alone in motherhood.
In Desperate you will find the story of one young mother’s honest account of the desperate feelings experienced in motherhood and one experienced mentor’s realistic and gentle exhortations that were forged in the trenches of raising her own four children.
A great encouraging book helping us to know that in the midst of all the busyness, motherhood is anything but insignificant and I think it just hits this nail squarely on the head. It is too easy to wonder if anything we are doing is worthwhile because raising other human beings can be so taxing.
The book focuses on the Gospel and how this should shape our desires, and realities in motherhood. The bigger picture from a theological perspective.
Contentment is a very big area of our lives and it really can affect our level of happiness and joy as mothers. It is such a nuanced and interesting topic that affects us all. This journey of motherhood that we are on is marked by profound love, joy, and sacrifice for our children, and as a Christian, I realise that my own contentment is ultimately rooted in the delicate dance between trusting in God’s providence, working diligently and purposefully, and having faith that God does, and can change my circumstances.
In the midst of this beautiful journey of raising my children, I sense another struggle within me which are feelings of “am I satisfied? Am I happy? How can I experience joy and fulfillment as I work hard to serve, love and be there for everyone else in my home?” These are searching questions and I ponder on them constantly because one thing that I am personally committed to, is being a happy and fulfilled woman and mother not only for my children, but for myself.
My contentment is often linked to my expectations of what I believe I should have, and where I believe I should be in life and I think part of what can create discontentment in motherhood, is dealing with the reality of limitations. When we become mothers, it’s inevitable to face certain limitations inherent to this role, because it is a distinctive journey unlike any other. We enter into a new season of life which requires a lot of shift and adjustment.
In our age of social media where curated images of perfection abound in all areas of life, it’s all too easy to fall into the trap of measuring our worth against carefully positioned and placed images and videos that display a standard and yardstick which we must all meet. While inspirational, we can find ourselves on a torturous cycle of constantly questioning our decisions, doubting our capabilities, and endlessly chasing after an idealised concept of motherhood that doesn’t truly exist- not 100% of the time anyway!
The arrival of our children brings countless blessings, but it also ushers in personal and relational (with our spouses) challenges that can test even the most resilient of us. Overnight, our lives change and our days become filled with endless demands, sleepless nights, and a constant juggling act to balance the needs of our children with our own desires and aspirations. How can we feel as though we are ok and not forgotten and unseen in the midst of it all? It’s a tough one that requires practical application grounded in scriptural direction.
Contentment and limitations
Very real and normal limitations to our lives and lifestyles will look different for each mother and I am learning that in order to cultivate contentment well, and find joy, I have to (by faith) adjust my expectations – bend them if you will to my current limitations. High expectations are good, and needed in some areas of our lives as they drive us forward to achieve goals, however I have experienced that my unmovable stance when it comes to my expectations being met in a very specific way actually creates overwhelm for me because it collides head on with my reality which in most cases is different. This then leaves me either frustrated or paralysed and feeling like I am suffocating under it all.
So what can we do? Adjusting our expectations to our limitations can help produce thankfulness, progress and good fruit in our hearts and lives. This is where the faith aspect comes in because it requires a willingness to surrender our desires and expectations to God, trusting that His plans for our lives—and the lives of our children—are far greater than we could ever imagine (Jeremiah 29:11). We live in a fast paced all or nothing world where passionately pursuing our own fulfillment is the norm, so anything that appears to threaten this is seen as a negative thing, even if it’s our own children.
Reconciling our expectations with the reality of our current lives is a great challenge that we’ll always have to find balance with, but in doing this well, I believe that we’ll be able to enjoy and accept the current season for what it is- good and bad while having hope toward something different in the future.
Many of us experience the mourning of our freedom and opportunities when we become mums. The pressure to “have it all” and continue exceling in every aspect of our lives—career, family, relationships—can weigh heavily on our shoulders, leaving us feeling like we are perpetually missing the mark. Natural comparison to other mums who seem to have it all figured out can increase our feelings of discontentment, frustration and disappointment.
Either your a boss babe that can do it all, a stay at home mother who has opted out of the pursuit of career and financial rewards, or a mixture of both. Either way, the issue of contentment comes up because we are women, a lot of us are very capable, and we want to feel as though our output in life matches with the financial reward and our inherent sense of worth.
Even though our once familiar routines become disrupted, and our priorities shift, adjusting our expectations to our limitations can help to shift our focus from impossibility to possibility which is so encouraging! I’ll give two examples from my life.
My personal experience: two examples
I really enjoy exercising, and before I had children, I had the freedom to workout without interruption, I could go to gym classes, or use the gym if I wanted to. My life in this season looks very different as I have had to cancel my gym membership and workout from home. In the beginning I absolutely hated it and felt resentful towards the fact that I couldn’t have my time the way I wanted to.
I felt very annoyed for a good few months. Why should I have to miss out on what is really important to me? I don’t enjoy working out at home at all and enjoyed the change of environment and focus at the gym. Well I have had to adjust my expectation to this limitation and instead of struggling against it, I have had to bend my will (painfully on a lot of days) to my reality, and redirect my thoughts to see the opportunity of how I can make good with what I can do now. I now workout early in the mornings when the boys are asleep, and I have actually grown to enjoy it. Some times they wake up, and when they do they play around me.
I am always having to train my mind from seeing the lack, to being thankful that I can still have time and opportunity to do something. If this should change in the future, I’ll gladly take it (!!) but for now, this will do and in accepting it as a good thing, good fruit is growing from it.
Another area is in the area of teaching the boys our native language (Twi). This has been a desire of mine since we got married 8 years ago. My husband speaks it fluently, but what is my limitation? I don’t. It didn’t stop me from having very high expectations for myself and my children though and I have wanted them to learn to speak and understand from an early age. As you can imagine this has brought a lot of frustration and feelings of failure as I am no where near the goal of speaking it fluently and passing it down to the boys.
Then I realised that the high expectation was a huge burden that was paralysing me from moving forward. The mountain just felt so huge. So I had to adjust my expectations to my reality by deciding that if all I can do to encourage our culture is work with the boys on a few words etc, translating for them (because I understand the language), songs, and stories, it is still a great seed sowing investment. They may not grow up speaking fluently, but they will still know about their heritage and hopefully have an appreciation and love for it, which is ultimately what we want! Settling my heart in this has brought the joy back in teaching them Twi.
Hope in finding contentment
Amidst the challenges that we face, there is hope for our journeys. Finding contentment after motherhood can feel like this grand finish line that we all need to reach, but I think it’s actually something that God wants us to diligently embrace while we are on the journey. That’s when our eyes and heart open up to see His goodness and faithfulness to us as we grow and encounter new and different life experiences. Acknowledging and accepting the inherent challenges of motherhood can co- exist with immeasurable joy and fulfillment.
We have the liberty to explore our interests and passions, nurture relationships, take time to pour into ourselves with the things we enjoy and so much more within motherhood because we have this new role that propels us forward into a stronger version of ourselves daily. We just have to take our time, breathe and trust that as long as we maintain a healthy balance, perspective and level of discipline, we can attain a lot of our goals. It may just look different to how we want to do it!
Finding contentment in motherhood requires a shift in our mindset which is a conscious choice to embrace the beauty and imperfection of our lives. Contentment is not static- a do once and finish with it type of thing. It is meant to be a daily pursuit (and let’s be real, fight sometimes) to drink from the fresh flowing water of grace available to us each day as we ask God to renew our minds, strengthen us, help us live purposeful and disciplined lives, and above all to anchor our joy, worth and value in Him and not in the world.
Here are two scriptures which I hope will encourage you in this area of contentment.
Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content: I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
Philippians 4:11- 13
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
Matthew 11:28-30
How do you deal with cultivating contentment in your own life?
In the beautiful confetti flying chaos of raising a family, it is easy to lose sight of the bigger picture that supports and knits your dreams and ideals together with your current reality. Managing multiple daily commitments, activities, social events, plans and relationships under one household can be an extremely demanding and overwhelming responsibility.
In the midst of all the hustle and bustle of moving from room to room, and in and out of the front door, it can honestly feel like I am living in a whirlwind with no idea where everyone will eventually land. Pausing to think or remember what is driving our family is far and few between, but its the most important checker in determining whether we are in or out of focus for our life goals.
An anchor for our busy days
One thing that has been a helpful anchor in the busyness of motherhood is our family mission statement. We created and still revisit our statement to clarify our why, because we are very big on living with intent and in purpose. It has helped me to move with efficiency when it comes to running my home, and making decisions that serve my family well.
This document that you work on (and keep updating) is such an impactful declaration that helps to shape and give a visual of how you want to live out your days. It clarifies direction, purpose, focus, values, beliefs, identity and motivation. It’s a great way to hold us accountable and remind us of the good and the big in the difficult moments and seasons.
Have you ever considered what values and principles guide your family’s journey?
Introducing the Family Path Mission Statement Printable! A powerful tool created to help you dream, define and express your family’s core beliefs, goals, and aspirations! Created by me, a fellow mum, it was important for me to share something that helps you to reflect on what matters to you most so that you can get to work building the best home that you possibly can.
Why do I need a Family Path Mission Statement?
For clarity, intention and purpose: Stan (my husband) always refers to us needing a true north, meaning a core centre that always pulls us back to the things that are the true foundation of our lives: Our faith in Jesus, our character and our work. Having a family statement helps to give clarity to our busy busy days and calendars. We can take control and create a roadmap that is filled with intentionality and purpose!
It knits hearts together: Although I am much of an introvert, I am also a big team player. I want my team to reach success and I want my home to be filled with minds and hearts that are one. We need a common vision that lights our souls, and creates a a kind of safety for us to grow and become. God sets the blueprint for us and gives us the room to build together which is a privilege I don’t take lightly.
It helps with process of elimination: In our busy household, I feel like I blink and our calendar for the month is already full! The schedules, activities and socials can at times be mind spinning. In the midst of this, having a mission statement to refer to helps us to know what to accept and what to choose our absence from. For me, it has helped me to be efficient in running my household because if it isn’t in or near our plans, we don’t need to spend time or energy on it!
Empower Your Family’s Journey Today!
It is an honour to be able to partner with God and my husband in shaping the future of our family. It’s a vital role that we play and I hope you’ll be encouraged to know that God is and can use you to unlock purpose and intentionality within your home.
To purchase the Family Path Mission Statement Printable and embark on this meaningful journey with your family, visit the shop today.
Here’s to crafting a future filled with love, unity, and purpose!
I am humbled by the breadth and depth of my role as a mother to my 3 boys. I am even more humbled (and often overwhelmed!) by the opportunity to be able to be with them each and everyday – watching them grow and come into their own.
The motherhood journey isn’t easy at all, and yet I truly believe that it is a sacred calling. It is an incredibly enriching and character shaping role in which we need all the encouragement and love to just keep going- one- day-at -a -time. It is deeply refining.
I am guilty of getting lost in the busyness of everyday life and responsibilities (because it all needs to be done!) and I often forget to fill my cup up as I am pouring into others everyday. It is easy for me to reach burnout and I have come to realise that daily short reminders and affirmations are a great way for me to incorporate multiple infusions into my mind and heart as I train, live with, enjoy, discipline and disciple my children.
I am always researching, reading, downloading, printing and creating something for the boys and you must do too! I thought that while we are busy making wonderful resources for our children, we should also be encouraged along the way, because as tough as our motherhood journey is, it is also incredibly beautiful and we can thrive in it by the grace of God.
I created these downloadable and free printable scripture based affirmations for mums. May they encourage, edify and remind you of your significant significant role as mum.
My boys by nature are already bent towards wonder. If they aren’t jumping off furniture imagining that they are flying superhero agents sent to rescue the world, they are completely immersed in the land of all things soil, mud and water as they dig to find treasure, or create foundations to build forts, castles and temples!
There is a part of us that has a longing. A deep well within us that needs filing with the fullness of God, but If I am honest, the thought of awaking wonder in the hearts of my boys feels like an intimidating prospect because there is a huge part of me that feels stuck when I consider being this other version of myself who is free spirited and sees and feels all the beauty around me.
It feels hard because I have been trained into a system that values results, efficiency, competitive edge, hurriedness over a slower more savored pace of life. I suppose the title of this blog post should be “how to awaken wonder in my own heart”.
My boys by nature are already bent towards wonder. If they aren’t jumping off furniture imagining that they are flying superhero agents sent to rescue the world, they are completely immersed in the land of all things soil, mud and water as they dig to find treasure, or create foundations to build forts, castles and temples. I honestly look at them most times in amazement. We absolutely have hunters, wrestlers, producers and conquerors in our midst! They are so cool and remind me that we have an innate pull within us to bring forth creativity in our own unique way.
I have to be honest also, that most of the time, I am also thinking “what on earth…” because I just feel so far removed from the way a boys brain is wired to work! Yet God has given me this portion. The three most wonderful boys to nurture, disciple and raise into wonderful men who reflect the image of God.
When I think of awakening wonder in the hearts of these souls, I think about leaving a legacy of hearts that beat after the unseen things of this world, while appreciating the very things that anchor us in real relationship, community and life. I think of hearts that beat strongly and thirst for knowledge in real tangible ways, hearts that feel full and satisfied with the precious simplicities of life that we are so unfamiliar with. Awaking wonder to me is about loving and nurturing each boy individually so that they grow roots in who they are without ever feeling the need to compete with others. To feel wholeheartedly secure in Christ and in your place in this world is probably the most anchoring experience that we can desire.
My view of education is changing and I never ever thought that I would experience this! I see now that it isn’t linear. The path to “success” and fulfillment isn’t just one way that we all have to walk and I need them to know this. There is so much wonder, so much to ponder on, so much to explore and to wrestle with in this rich life and I really want them to have this. Academic success is important, but I believe that a life undergirded by faith and inner character is more of a blessing- brings forth more of a fruitful and full life.
I want them to be free enough in their minds to build a deeply fun life giving enough time for their hearts to taste and see all that life has to offer. Seeking after it. Finding wonder and inspiration that organically and authentically propels them forward to their next learning adventure- because it truly never stops.
I love a good refresh and reset, and some days call for it when things don’t go according to plan. In today’s post I’ll be sharing 5 quick and simple things that you can implement as a mum to press the refresh button and freshen up your day!
Tip 1: Tidy up a space in your home
I am a big believer that as human beings that need connection and feed off of our surroundings, the environment that we live in can and does have a big impact on how we can feel.
As a mum of three, it’s quite difficult to always keep the main living areas clean and clutter free. This definitely can leave me feeling overwhelmed. Once day I realised that doing my best to keep my kitchen countertops clean, and the dishes washed made me feel so good every time I walked into that area. It instantly lifted my mood and made me feel somewhat put together to have a small area clean throughout the day.
For you it could be a corner of your living room, the bathroom or even the hallway. Give this tip a go and see if it helps to make you feel a little refreshed.
Tip 2: Take a quick or long walk outside
Since having my boys, I have grown to love being outdoors. Even more so to release all of the boisterous energy out into the open! They get time to run, shout and play while I use the time to literally breath. To be out in the open and specifically in nature is deeply calming to the soul and gives a sense of smallness in comparison to the magnitude of everything.
If I can’t make it out to a park or forest, and the weather is good, simply walking in my garden provides the same effect. When we didn’t have a garden, I utilised our balcony, and it became a place of solace for me to reflect, pray and express gratitude. If you don’t have either, then you can open a window and let more of the outdoors in. It really does help to recharge your day.
Tip 3: Take a shower
This may sound funny, but it really works! As busy mums, it can be so difficult to have time to enjoy a proper shower with all the spa like trimmings (facials, body scrubs etc). When I am able to during the day – I ask my husband for a few minutes and I jump into the shower. The feeling of the warm water and a nice smelling shower gel is instantly calming for me. Some days I sneak in 2 showers, one in the morning and another in the later afternoon just to give myself a boost for the day.
Tip 4: Prepare a lunch that you enjoy
We all know that eating well provides important sustenance to the body and yet it can be really difficult to find the time or motivation to prepare simple nutritious meals that will leave us feeling boosted and not deflated or bloated. Having a few quick meals that you enjoy eating can really be a mood changer when you are having a long or difficult day.
I take time to prepare the meal, expressing gratitude to the Lord for his provision. This instantly makes me feel blessed. Some foods that I enjoy making are scrambled eggs with avocado toast, a greek salad with grilled chicken, tortilla wraps, (root) vegetable soup, smoothies and grilled or roasted vegetables. These tend to be my quick go-to’s which leave me feeling happy because I have nourished my body.
Tip 5: Write down 3 things that you are thankful for
I love this one because
It can encourage you to pause.
To think through things.
To breathe.
Journaling and writing down encourages us to always come to God with a heart of true, sincere gratitude- which is so life transforming. It helps us to be very intentional about our thanksgiving to God. With very busy days, it can be easy to forget about the things that you are grateful for but choosing to carve out 5-10 minutes in your day to express gratitude helps you to stay focused on the things that truly matter in your life.
Have you tried any of these tips? I would love to hear in the comments below! There are so many other things that we can do to refresh and recharge ourselves as mothers. Feel free to comment on more to encourage another mum.
gracedforhome.com 