I looked at my little 5 year old as I attempted to engage him in some sit down learning and I felt two strong emotions. Compassion because I could see he wasn’t just struggling with the task, but he really wasn’t enjoying it. I also felt frustrated because here we were, on yet another day and I felt like a failure at not being able to “crack the code” when it came to winning his interest and attention to sit down and work through some pages with me.
Teaching our children can feel like a very daunting task, and one of the beautiful benefits of home schooling is that learning can be tailored to the strengths of each child, and time can be given to really personalise their learning experience and build their confidence. Equally, it can be frustrating because you are dealing head on with their struggles everyday. If you are feeling overwhelmed with where to start with the different personalities of your children, here are some strategies that you can try which I hope will help:
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1. Identify Each Child’s Learning Style

Understanding how each child learns best is the first step. Common learning styles include visual (learning through images and spatial understanding), auditory (learning through listening and speaking), kinesthetic (learning through physical activities and hands-on experiences), and reading/writing (learning through reading and writing activities). Supporting our children to learn in a way that is natural to them will help them thrive and it will alleviate a lot of the frustration that we and they feel when it comes to growing learning and discovering the word around them.
It takes time and you may have good days and bad days, but I’m learning to just embrace it all and take my time and try to enjoy the process. First born is very much a kinaesthetic learner and so I can exercise wisdom in this area, and instead of expecting and demanding him to do book work, what I try to do with his learning is to break it up into chunks of tasks. He will do what I refer to as core discipline studies which is a few minutes on penmanship, working out some number sums, and a little bit of phonics. Once he has completed that, his reward is working on a lego project or STEM activity which he absolutely loves.
2. Create a variety of learning activities:
Offer a mix of activities that cater to different learning styles. For example:
- For visual learners: You could use diagrams, charts, videos, and illustrations to explain concepts.
- For auditory learners: Engage in discussions, storytelling, reading aloud, and listening to educational podcasts.
- For kinesthetic learners: Incorporate hands-on activities, experiments, role-playing, and physical games.
- For reading/writing learners: Provide written materials, encourage note-taking, and assign reading assignments followed by discussions or written summaries.
DIY project tasks have worked really great with my eldest because it allows him to use his brain in a very active way which he absolutely loves. He loves to solve puzzles, and find solutions to tasks, so this has really engaged him. I also see how it fuels his confidence because once he realises his strength and what he’s naturally good at, he wants to learn more and he wants to do more. He loves to talk about the things that he’s created and how he has put it together which is so encouraging to hear.
My second born is predominantly a read and write learner. He takes in information that’s written down in a very logical way. He enjoys books and equations so I find that the traditional books work well. He enjoys the typical comprehension, questions and tasks, and figuring things out, so my approach for him, leans towards text, and any visual or auditory representation of an idea, which he does really well with. Seeing these two different learning styles makes me realise that God really makes none of us the same. We are wired so differently, so uniquely, so wonderfully by Him. As a mother, it is amazing to be able to nurture and bring out, and help my children to discover who God has made them to be.
3. Provide Choices
And another way you could figure out your child’s learning style is by providing them with a few choices for different types of work that you want them to complete over the period of a few weeks and observe what they gravitate to. This will help you to know where to lean into for learning activities. You can also engage in conversation with them about things they enjoy and why they enjoy it. This will give you an idea of how to put together their learning and play sessions. Hopefully in doing this, it will help your child to enjoy and stay focused on what they consider to be fun while also learning and activating a huge part of their brains in an activity.
Offer choices whenever possible to empower children in their learning process. For instance, allow them to choose from different assignments or projects that align with their interests and learning styles. Observe how your children respond to different learning activities and environments. Talk to them about their preferences and experiences in learning situations.
4. Create an environment that makes learning look fun
I am a minimalist calm, create a spa like ambience in my home type of girl, and so the thought of turning my entire home into a nursery or learning class doesn’t quite appeal to me, but I do recognise that for children, visuals are so important for inspiration, for memory, and for representation of where they are in this life stage. My laminator, my printer and Twinkl website are my best friends as I print put together little resources and learning packs for the boys.
I always have to remember that they are children and it’s important to encourage them to see the world with wonder, and to beautify it in a way that appeals to their senses. When I look at it from that perspective, creating a learning environment whether it’s a corner, conservatory, a whole room, or a bedroom seems like so much fun and even an inspiration to myself.
Creating a fun learning environment can really enhance their engagement and enthusiasm for learning. Most of us don’t have a separate room that we can turn into a magical learning world for them but if we really look around, we’ll see that we have pockets of space throughout our homes that we can use. If you want to encourage a love of books, you could create a small nook with either a book shelf or some baskets and keep a few books there, or scatter small piles of books throughout the house for them to casually pick up. The same can be done with toys and puzzles or whatever their interest may be.
5. Assess, pivot, personalise and pray
We can pray and ask God to give us wisdom to encourage and teach our children, as well as to give the process over to Him to do a work in our own hearts. We all change as we grow and so do our children’s learning styles over time. Keeping our expectations open will help us to pivot when we need to without feeling too overwhelmed. I am trying to be so much more intentional about just enjoying life and enjoying the process with them. The rest will surely fall into place as we journey along.
A book that has really encouraged me in this area is Sally Clarkson’s book: Awaking wonder. As mothers we want the best for our children. We want them to thrive in every area of their lives and we want to give them a strong foundation. However, it’s so easy to lose sight of the wonder that is found in the journey to this destination, and I think that I’ve come to understand how childlike wonder really can become lost in the fog of formulas, strict curriculum and pressure from external things. Helping my boys to engage authentically and confidently with who they are, while leaning into the truth that wonder and curiosity without constraints does empower such a powerful educational experience.
My encouragement to you Mama
“To give a child the gift of time to imagine, to dream, to create, to engage, and to wonder is to allow time and space for his heart to be touched by the beauty surrounding him, for his mind to have room to grow strong on the feast laid out for his imagination, and for his emotions to bathe in the tranquility of a peaceful life in an unhurried rhythm. Then we offer a feast of theology, math, story, literature, virtue, faith, science, nature, art, music and culture upon which to apply his wondering and wonderful mind. To lay this foundation is to give our children beauty and strength of imagination and the strong pleasure of learning and acquiring knowledge over a lifetime. Wonder is the catalyst in shaping a powerful, engaged intellect.”
Sally Clarkson




